Dedicated to the preservation and exhibition of famous meat throughout history, the Florine Kleinhoffer Museum is proud to present its recent aquisitions for the fall schedule.
Tin of Reconstituted “Meat” (circa 1974)
Once belonging to serial killer Charles Manson, this tin of meat byproduct was allegedly snuck into San Quentin in Squeaky Fromme’s uterine cavity along with a bottle of Riuniti and six dinner candles. Despite some minor rust on the hinge, the tin remains unopened and in good condition – a rare example of both prison contraband and canned polysynthetic meat paste.
Pair of Rare Appalachian Goat Knees
These fine set of knees were left over from the infamous 1870's Hatfield and McCoy feud. Preserved in a vat of beef drippings, historians believe they were either a common side dish, or used as propellants in the families' decade-long squable over the marriage of two laying hens.
Crate of Kangaroo Pockets
Considered a delicacy in the outback of Australia, kangaroo pockets are often dried, salted and served with a platter of “dingoberries” (i.e. cubed wolf meat). This particular example was left over from an aboriginal tribal meal which also included toowoombalala (fricasseed numbat tongue) and moodoloo (seared shrimp antennae).
Gingham Sausage Basket
Given to Mamie Van Doren from former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger, this fancy Bavarian-style basket of individually wrapped sausages remains completely intact. (Included are a gift card and six military-issued condoms complete with government seal and an entry key to bunker 6 at Omaha’s “Club Ground Zero.”)
Tureen of Jellied Eels
Served at King Henry VIII’s fourth wedding, this bejeweled tureen holds 13 perfectly preserved eels in clear aspic crowned with 6 crystallized clams and a *Dutch cucumber.
*Please note: due to light sensitivity, the cucumber will be displayed every other Thursday.
Tin of Cod Cheeks
Donated by the family of noted Norwegian playwright Henrik Ibsen, this tin of fish jowls was thought to have inspired the plot twists of many of the author’s plays. This is apparent in the infamous “cod nuzzling” scene in Peer Gynt.
Llama Taco
Given to Fidel Castro by Che Guevera during the 1956 Revolution, this taco prompted the leader to utter the famous words, “I am Fidel Castro and we have come to liberate Cuba…now pick up a gun and...hey, is that a llama taco?”
String of Thuringers
Although our curator is unsure of the origin of these sausage links, she is including it on permanent display due to the exceptionally high quality of its glistening, 32- foot long intestinal casing.
Whale Blubber Waistcoat
Worn by 19th century sailors off the shores of Nantucket, this natty vest sports squid sucker buttons and a lining of pure pelican skin. (Note: the inner pocket is crafted entirely of lamprey chins.)
Miscellaneous Bag of Meat
This valuable collection was left at the back door of the museum by an anonymous meat enthusiast. The contents include 6 Depression-era ring baloneys, 3 tins of Irish mincemeat, a pot roast from “The Donna Reed Show” and an *elephant foot fondue pot procured at a Nairobi airport by the late Earnest Hemingway.
*Please note: The fondue pot is for display purposes only and should in no way be used for cooking Hughie Long’s cube steak from exhibit 3.
